Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Give Me Twenty Pounds and I'll Buy you a Pint.


So I woke up yesterday morning and weighed myself on my Nintendo WII. It would seem that all my hard work and sacrifice has paid off. In the last three weeks I have lost quite a bit of weight and I’m now 224 pounds. I’m very shocked. I don’t really notice it but I feel sore enough to have lost that weight. I would like to celebrate with a dozen beers right now but I guess I can wait until the trip starts. Then I can work hard on getting all those pounds back. I mean... why not? I can lose it in three weeks why should I have to sacrifice and eat and drink healthy. What fun is that? I want bratwurst and beer and nachos and sour cream and steaks and pig... Lots of Pig.....


Was that my inner fat child trying to get out?


I can’t get that fat again. It was such a joyous morning when I weighed myself and the Nintendo downgraded me from ‘Obese’ to ‘Overweight’. You wouldn’t believe how happy I was to be overweight. But really who cares if I’m obese? It is what’s inside that counts. And I was full of bratwurst and beer and nachos and sour cream and steaks and pig... Quit it Elvis... Keep it together. It’s hard not to think about food when you have to cry yourself to sleep every night because you’re hungry.


Needless to say, I feel better. I’m 22 pounds lighter and I think I can be under 220 before I leave. What a difference that will make on my little motorcycle when I’m chugging up some mountain pass.


Not to mention I way more Speedo friendly now!




Anonymous said...

This is your mother...forget the Speedo

Anonymous said...

this is your mother...forget the speedo

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